I know quiet a few people in mixed marriages. You are in a tough position. There are things you need to discuss in earnest. Sometimes your family will not accept your choice and tell you that you need to choose them or her. Sometimes the parents come around to accept your love and other's who do not. There are a lot of people who believe that blacks should be with blacks and whites should be with whites. In the military it is more accepted than in a civilian community. How tough are you when you are verbally assulted for your choice? The victim of vandalism? Is it accepted in the area you choose to live? Are you prepared for the hate you will see or hear? Talk to some of the mixed race couples you know or have seen and find out what their story is. I think it is wonderful that you found your love and I hope things work out for you.

I'm a mom of 4. If your mom loves you, she'll get over it and/or learn to live with it. You only need to ask yourself if you can live with your mom's choice (whatever it is). You should also have a very frank discussion with your girl about Mom… and be prepared to CALMLY and rationally say (to ANYone who challenges YOUR choice), "Sorry you feel that way…" and.then.walk.away.

As a mother of three and an ex-wife of a retired member of the Air Force, my life and my childrens lives was a true eye opener when it comes to the multiculture in the Arm Forces. My children are all adults now and live their lives by their own choices. However, as much as we say race is not a factor my desire was that all my children marry within their race. My daughters both married within their race, however my son married a wonderful young lady who is not of his race. He also thought I would be devasted that he made a choice outside of what I desired. I welcomed his spouse into my life because it is truly about how the person feels about the other person. I do not sterotype and I am not prejudice, I did not want my son to be stared at, or treated badly because he chose to be with someone whom he loves. As a mother we want to protect our children whether they are 3 or 30.

I think you may be a little worried for nothing. Maybe your mom would like you to marry a girl of your own race as a preference but, in the end I think she just wants you to be happy and have a girl who will treat you and your family well. Maybe she fears for all of the racial issues you may face as a couple and doesn't want to see her boy hurt. There comes a time in every mans life that his wife will take over the number one place held by his mom. Now is the time for open discussions. Good luck and follow your heart on this one.